Friday, October 25, 2013

DNA doesn't lie

Second post for the day. This actually happened a while ago, but it came up again earlier this week and it's niggling at me.

I had to let My Past know that my ex was trying to get DNA tests done on our sons because the dates of my visit to Atlanta with My Past in 2005, made it possible that he may have been the father of my youngest son. However, it is abundantly clear that he is not as my youngest looks like a mini version of his oldest brother.. (which irks me, but he's MUCH cuter than his sibling). So my ex, Douchebag, has had at least 7 attempts at getting the boys DNA. My 9 year old Bad Boy informed me of this because it's not a pleasant experience.

Anyway, my assumption is that either Douchebag is a complete numpty and thinks that DNA tests are like pregnancy tests and can produce false results, or he's just inept and kept doing it wrong. Whichever option you go for, they're both right. He's not the smartest of people... Months ago, I informed My Past that he was off the hook, but he didn't let it go. Not immediately. He asked a lot of questions and got quite angry with me. So I couldn't decide whether he was angry that I had been so careless (although it takes two to tango and he didn't seem to care about protection at the time), or that I hadn't said anything sooner about the possibility he might have another child. He then asked for a pic of Lil One. He asked about dates. He asked what did I think. So I leaned towards a different possibility... that he WANTED Lil One to be his. I ended the ongoing discussion with "Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything at all." My concern had been that he would get slapped with a suit from my ex without me being warned in-between since Douchebag has contacted him before with legal threats. The big kicker was when he asked me if I would tell him if Lil One was his. And I said I didn't know. I doubted that I would. That's when he stopped communicating with me for a few months.

Fast-forward about 8 months to earlier this week and out of the blue, he asked me again, had there been any more tests. What were the results. Why would he be testing them if he didn't think... blah, blah, blah. Funnily I had asked him last week if he and his wife were planning on having kids, but he said no and when I asked why, he responded (somewhat angrily) "Not everyone wants kids". So there you go. Since I know he's always wanted kids and a family, and she's career military, I wonder if there's trouble in paradise. He has asked me in recent years if I would have more. Last year in Tucson it wasn't top of his list to ask if I had taken precautions either.

The subject of whether Lil One is his has touched a nerve with him. I feel for him, I really do. He wasn't thrilled and still hates my mum over our own 'loss' 16 years ago. I don't think he will ever forgive her for the events that happened at her instigation. She definitely forced her will on both of us and it's been hard for me to forget, but I hadn't realised how much it had affected him. I haven't heard from him again this week. I will though. He's never missed a birthday.


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