So I am without my boys for the week and my lil sis has decided that she has no interest in spending time with us, favouring instead the guy across the street who she shall probably never see or speak to again once she goes home in a couple of weeks. But that's OK. Baby Girl and I have a cunning plan.
I've mentioned before that lil sis is a little on the selfish side. And self-centered. Conceited. High Maintenance. Don't get me wrong, she can be a lot of fun once she's had a couple of beers, but when she told me back in June when she first arrived that no one likes to talk to her, I can now understand why! No one wants to hear her criticism. For two reasons:
1. We're all entitled to our opinions. However, my sister is of the school of thought that hers is the only one. We all know someone like this. I am special and know two people, my dad and my sister.
An example: We have spaghetti night every Tuesday, my sister stated that I have an unhealthy diet and didn't want to eat the 'cow' meat. Because I eat pasta. Hers is so much better. Here is a day in her diet: breakfast (around 10am): egg white omelet with spinach and mushrooms. This is actually not bad. Lunch: A bag of Ruffles. If she eats anything at all. This may also substitute as an afternoon snack. Dinner: She doesn't eat dinner. Midnight snack: May consist of anything from Taco Bell, McDonalds, Nachos etc etc, accompanied by copious amounts of alcohol, because in her words "Can't have just one. I only drink to get drunk" Because that's so much healthier than what I eat. Compare:
Breakfast - 8am: Turkey sausage, egg and cheese on either a bagel or toast with Earl Grey tea. Successfully hitting three food groups: Protein, Dairy and complex carbs. Some days I will also have an apple around 10am
Lunch 11-1: Usually ham, salami and Swiss sub, with lettuce, a small bag of potato chips and green tea
Snack 2-3pm: A fiber One brownie, or cereal bar
Dinner 6-7: Spaghetti with low-fat ground beef bolognese, a glass of wine (for example) There are veggies in the bolognese sauce, and I recently discovered hidden veggie pasta, which the kids LOVE.
So I don't know. Who do you think is the healthiest? I may not be a stick figure, but I can be described as having an athletic figure. Because I work out to maintain my size, not starve myself with a ridiculous 'diet'. If I sat around on my butt all day, drinking beer and playing games online, I would probably continue to be overweight like I was during my unhappy marriage!
This is a fairly tame issue that she has expressed an odd opinion of. There are other much more serious ones that show a distinct lack of maturity.
2. Her conceited nature. No one is as perfect as she is. I call this narcissism a coping mechanism or distraction technique. She is deluding herself. She has told me that our mother has said that I was worse than her at her age. I fail to see how this is even possible, since at 22 I had a job, a home and a child. She is barely managing to stay in school, lives at home and is fully financially dependent on her parents. I haven't been FULLY financially dependent on either parent since I was 16. I've always worked. Oh she's had jobs, but she has never had to contribute to any bills. Like I did (yes, I'm bitter, this pisses me off). She's never had to face responsibility. Mum has always been there to mop up her messes. She is book-smart, but only in the subjects she has learned in school. During her time with me, I've found several 'gaps' in her knowledge, but when you find one, her excuse is "I don't need to know that" or "Well, how am I supposed to know that?" Uh, here's a crazy thought, read something, watch something new, don't be so myopic.
Anyway, I could go on and on, but suffice it to say. I'm frankly fed up with her. And the excuses I hear from our mother. So Baby Girl and I have elected to pretend she is not here. So we went out for dinner last night, tonight I may be going out to dinner with a friend, Wednesday it's the movies with a friend, Thursday I have another dinner (it's Raleigh Restaurant Week, what can I say) and then the weekend is all sewn up as well with plans to go to Lazy Days and hang out at a wine bar. Next week will be fun, with the boys going back to school there will be a whole new dynamic in the house, but the coup de grace that Baby Girl and I are particularly proud of: Buying up all the snack foods that lil sis loves to eat and putting them on the 'untouchable' shelf in the pantry... we have Ben & Jerry's (this is in the freezer, not the pantry), Ruffles, take'n'bake bread and Heinz Baked Beans - Baby Girl wasn't happy that she ate her Baked Beans!
So if we're lucky, the last laugh will be on her. She has been spoilt and pandered to her whole life by our mum and her dad. I will not be another one that lets her think that her behaviour is ok. I debated letting my mum know how rude she is being and being disappointed that she has made no effort to hang out with us, but then I thought why? Why allow my mum to make more excuses? And reiterate how this is 'exactly what she's been trying to tell me'. I can see where the problems stem from, and my mum is right there in the middle of it. I wish I had HALF the attention my lil sis gets from OUR mother. I wouldn't feel so damn cast-out!
There will be harsh words said at some point in the next week. She needs to know this is not how you treat family. I am not afraid to be the one to tell her.