Friday, December 7, 2012

The Dating Game... Gender Equality?

So I wanted to take a minute to throw a thought out there... In this new world of equality between the sexes, and I use that term "equality" loosely, should we also expect the rules of dating to change? I mean. Is it so difficult for a guy who finds a woman attractive to simply approach her and ask her out to dinner? Or a movie? Bowling perhaps? Can someone please explain to me why 21st century men somehow expect that since we (women) have earned some equality, that we should now also be the ones to 'make the first move'. I recently had a conversation with a young, attractive, EMPLOYED male (over a lunch that I paid for), who repeatedly insists that I should be the one asking him out. It went something like this:

Him: "So why don't I have time on your schedule this weekend?"
Me: "You didn't ask"
Him: "But why should I have to ask? You find me attractive, don't you?" At this point, I lost interest. I'm old school and prefer men with a little confidence who don't fish for compliments.
Me: "I don't like to play word games. If you want to go out, you simply have to ask."
Him: "So what you're saying is you don't want to see me this weekend?" And on... and on...

I should insert a side note that states I don't have a problem being the one to ask, however after two 'dates' with this guy, he had yet to break out his wallet...

The conversation continued in this same vein for a few more minutes, the end result being I probably won't be seeing him again, since he will probably never ask. Or pay.

So. I have a great job with a nice salary, but I'm also a single mother of three with a mortgage, nanny, bills and myriad other financial responsibilities. All things being equal in terms of civil rights, does that also mean that the roles have also morphed into pseudo-equal terms? I mean if it's now expected that the female should make the first move, does that now mean that I can also play the field the same way men do? It's only fair isn't it? This came up in conversation this week with another single female friend of mine. While listening to a radio show, the subject of men sleeping with multiple partners came up. Man can sew his wild oats and be hailed a hero. Woman is a whore.

So now I am also faced with the challenge of somehow meeting a possible companion who lives up to his reputation on paper in real-life and somehow work out if we will also have chemistry in the bedroom, without trying him out for 'sighs'? You see what I did there? Pretty clever, huh?

Wish me luck!

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